The new Fantastic 4 reboot is anything but fantastic, I rate
it 2/10, 1 Star.
Maybe the 4 is how high they were hoping people would rate
it?
There is one thing in particular that I really can't get over
due to the comic-book geek inside me and the wrong done by it but I'll get to
that later. Fantastic 4 starring Michael B. Jordan (Chronicle), Miles Teller
(Whiplash), Kate Mara (House of Cards), Jamie Bell (King Kong) and Toby Kebbell
(Dawn of the Planet of the Apes) is the biggest let down of the year so far and
I honestly don't think anything will top it, firstly and this is a big thing
for any Marvel family but this one in particular; during this film there
was no 'team' feel the entire way through, there was no group dynamic at all;
the four aren’t even in the same place UNTIL after they get their powers,
and there’s no shared screen-time between the 4 of them until well into over
half way through Invisible Girl and Thing don’t even have a good interaction,
pretty sure they don't even talk until the last scene, it doesn't feel like
there's really any family bond between any of them, Reed Richards and Ben Grimm
are supposedly lifelong friends but in the film only have the bare minimum of
scenes together as adults and Sue Storm isn't even present when the team are 'created' but Victor Von Doom is, that's just completely wrong.
Now to that thing I really can't get over; Doom. Doom is one of Marvel's most powerful characters, and he should look the part. In the new Fantastic 4 he looked about as intimidating as the
Nintendo Wii's interface. Also, Doom's superpowers make absolutely 100% no sense. He can (to put it simply) do anything he chooses, from simple telekinesis to advanced telekinesis to making people’s heads explode and his plot to destroy Earth is completely random because there was very little build up or a sub-plot explaining it apart from right near the start when he mentions one line about "The people in charge of the world are also the ones driving it into the ground".
The story's events are poorly timed and executed, the film is nearly 2 hours long yet it felt really rushed, the entire first hour of the film builds up to... Wait for it... Nothing, nothing at all, about half way through the story jumps forward an entire year which would have been okay if they had explained what had been going on in this year, but there was no plot evolution or anything, it was just awful writing and the last battle scene is over in barely 10 minutes. The film also totally disregards the comics and replaces it with nothing good, the director actually told the cast not to read up on their comic-counterpart's backgrounds because he wasn't going to take anything from the series of Marvel Ultimate Comics apart from a slight, minor inspiration, the film is trying very, very hard to be a dark and gritty sci-fi adaptation but without using any of the reading material which in it's self completely strips the film of any passion or a personality. The CGI in this film is terrible, I am no expert when it comes to doing special effects so it's probably much better than anything I could make but if you're going to try and make a dark and gritty sci-fi superhero film then the one thing you really should do well is the CGI, it honestly looks like it was produced in a microwave oven; the rendering is extremely poor and there's little attempt to even cover up this terrible work, for example when Sue Storm/Invisible Girl uses her force-field powers there's a stretchy-plastic looking Kate instead of the real actress, the Thing actually looks good, although he doesn't wear anything which was a bit of a shock to see, maybe the studio was going for some rocky comic relief (sorry).
Ultimately, the film is a poorly organised mess of ideas with extremely bad execution, terrible CGI and pays absolutely no respect to the comics, so the studio may as well have not even made a Fantastic 4 and made their own film, it probably would have been better. A few scenes were mildly entertaining, Thing looked good, and Fox did manage to name the characters correctly so this is why I give the film 2/10 instead of 0.
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